What can we learn from the Song of Solomon?
1. Men are body focused and women are relationship focused. Women have a desire to be chased, cared for and loved. While, men are attracted to our look and want us. Our bodies don't have to be a perfect 10 in order for this to happen because God has created us to connect on all the levels of intimacy (spiritual and emotional), not just the physical. It's interesting that God created men and women so differently in regards to sex. As with everything God does, it's purposeful. The purpose is for us to focus on how to meet the needs of the other person. For women to get our deepest relational needs met, we need to focus on our husband's need for sex. For men to get their deepest needs for sex met, they need to focus on our need for relationship!
2. Sex starts in our heads. We get distracted easily. As queens of multi-tasking, the bedroom isn't the place for this. We actually need to try hard to stay focused. We see this demonstrated in the Song of Solomon when she keeps focused by talking about him, his body, his work, his reputation, and reflecting our their dating days because for her, it was now she kept her head in the game!
3. Invite God into your bedroom. Pray and read scripture as part of the experience. (On a side note, I've tried this and it hasn't failed me yet!) Making love is a journey toward intimacy. It's learning together, laughing about the mistakes and awkwardness and enjoying the uniqueness that you've created together. Remember that God created marriage to express his love through a human relationship. Love, to be expressed through bringing total union of the physical, emotional, and spiritual.